wil edit with a vote in a sec fellas.. im excited to read
A conquerer over land dwellers and one hundred herds
province divided into 2 thirds by a warrior from demented worlds
Never worst unsheathed cursed sword shines when its twirled
brighter than nova bursts jugulars hacked creating thirsts
nice, i like how you don't necessarily start with just the image but where and when the image may have taken place
There he stands with piercing eyes scabbard golden at his side
prepared to deny lives besides dead men leave many wives
His rank is Sei-i-tai blade unveiled pointing towards the sky
swing his arm and with every try blood gets shed like fuel supplys
great multi's and wording up to the end i just dont know whether the simile worked here.. felt the seriousness of the excerpt made it seem corny
Minamoto clan leader dressed in ceremonial type guise
ruled for 234 years untill 1575 and ended many lives
During war crimes he escaped trials place shrunken heads
fit in burlap vials they ran wild and birthed many a child
Mean while the blade speaks creating razor fashioned smiles
wow.. really appreciate the factual lines, worried about the flow when i saw heads but it went right through undetected.. nice done
next in line time after time comes adolecent sem-pies (apprentises)
After 17 years of moon cycles risen rise and sunshines some one dies
hmm.. although this was a nice bar the multi's were a bit forced as you went with the simple 'ies' end rhyme
i`ll clarify to readers wise wicked and wild a sho-guns life
well disciplined ronin warriors never sling the blade inspite
As caligraphers write cartographers scribe of meritorious lives
wielders of blacksmith guilded green destinys holder of knives
jesus this hit for me i loved it multi's were enough to hype me through it.. but what really needs to be rewarded here was the vocabulary or more so just the choice or words
Stead fast on his path he brings enemies certain death decrees
pre-requisit recipies and if he fails! to him self!... Hari-Kiri.
ok.. it just doesn't hold the same content or value as the rest of your verse
Induced unrefuted minds cant compute it! self termination!
emperors students educated dedication six sho-guns cypher elimination!
nicely done but seems like filler in comparison to me, calm down just to me
A cliffs destination awaited majestically as each lept of the edge
They knew with a failure one had to "know the ledge"
nice.. nothing else, nice
linked by focal telepathy in reality its jepardy effortlessly
literally a shoguns epitapth a venerable signed death decree.
very nice ending well worded, thanks for the read
As the sun sets and the cloudy sky parts..
Two Bushi blessed warriors with infinite beating hearts..
Ready their weapons and slowly take a breath in..
Align stars to portray the messages of Bushido perfections..
oh god, seriously, you're going to make this tough aren't you.. nasty opening
The night came as fireworks fuse's were lit..
Light fades.. Sky opens for those to witness..
Minamoto and Tiara warriors swing blades, scream pain..
breathe flames, choreographed war, stumbles past insane..
fuck you.. effortless flow.. insane wording(pun) i liked this a lot
swords slash, smash into halfs, to my knees I went..
I reached untill stars were in grasp..spirit heaven sent...
I blinded him with a question when I asked for death..
I clenched my tanto. Insterting it 10 inches below my chest..
whoa.. did you just go first person on me.. love it the three lines beginning with "I" may have been excessive and the multi's stopped on the second bar, what gives?
Shoved the edge deep, cut left to right, let the handle go..
Recited a pledge.. The words I spoke seemed to flow..
like this in conjunction with the last section sorry i separated it
"To die at a sword tip will gain me infinite existance..
Deminish the distance between me and my apprentice..
The stars will listen to your wishes and shoot accordingly..
Supporting dreams and aborting all other forms of grief..
multiple syllable flow and tough choice words here loved the wording.. my favorite excerpt of the two pieces thus far
Accept the fact that intellect is intact and the sky is yours."
My heart sat.. In two halves..silent with a poetic force...
eww.. nasty!
The sun rise's after the sky was ripped apart..
A nite, so violent.. Brought to you by two beating hearts..
blood departs, I have forsakened the Sacred Armor..
brought shame to my father, kaishakunin with one swing,
restores my honor...
uhhhh.. that was an ill ass ending
tough job here to vote.. first off i like to thank the writers when i read a great piece so thanks to both of you. you both made DC look like a brotherhood of ability here
honestly these may have been two of the best worded drops i've personally read on
RF in recent time.. xylo you chose to have the longer bars and i think that may have brought a tad bit of filler.. 7th you went short and sweet and i think that made me wish there was more.. but both of you used incredible vocabulary and choice wording..
bottom line it has to be a personal opinion on who's verse i enjoyed more so as hard as it is to do..
v- 7th
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Topical Belt (Xylo):Xylo(11-11) vs. ((7th Crescent))(13-11) 
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