Open Mic Belt: ((Schematic)) vs. Jay-Rede

[STRONGARM]

12 Bars Due Friday 09/12/08. Vote on other Battles..!

[Schematic]

Goodluck mayne

[Jay-Rede]

You Too Dude

Chased home from school, Reluctant to let the liquid salt show,
Got a knife pulled out today, then they smacked him with a rock blow,
A bruise formed fast, legs run faster to his bedroom,
A tiny little box, with very little leg room,
Abuse formed in the kitchen, the stench of alcohol was drifting,
And blinding pain gripped him, from the place where they had kicked him,
Not safe at school, education was his only lifeline,
Felt unsafe in the day, but feared the worst at night time,
Screaming boomed his ears, covering them with his blanket,
Blocking out his thoughts, he taught his memory to blank it,
He never had a doubt that this torture would be his fate's depth,
And should he run away? contemplating how to fake death,
A fear passed him quick, but he felt guilty for his next flare,
Wondering what Heavens like? but at least he could rest there,
And then the booming of the stairs, had him fearing for his life now,
So he cocked back, and on the trigger, one shot, and it's lights out.

I just went for 8 man. Goodluck my dude

[Schematic]

Smh..

The panic ensues as soon as Matic's in view,
Watch me scatter the room faster than asteroids move.
This Rapflava shit? Its like a full time job to me.
So ill stay stackin paper, while ya'll fold my laundry.
Keep tuckin your knees, and get the fuck out my lap.
I beat suckers with trees, makem suck out the sap.
My styles the malediction, I got that fuckin battle-sickness.
They see the bullet holes like, "What kind of Matic is this??"
I drove you bitches off the road to riches,
Plus my flows are known to give kids motion sickness.
And I spit cane so you know I be numbin.
The way that I run this... my nicknames The Incumbent.
Im so wild with these rhymes that, when im schoolin you kids...
Youll thank god for that no child left behind act.
Gone in sixty seconds, Im the bomb when I spit.
Im like Lebron and James Bond if they bonded and shit!
My talent has no limit, therefor I am the infinite.
So in my lifetime your life might pass in a minute.
I straight devour that foolish talk, yall barely even food for thought.
So all these fuckin battles got me chewin' alot!

Done.

[Exis]

Jay:

Chased home from school, Reluctant to let the liquid salt show,
Got a knife pulled out today, then they smacked him with a rock blow,
A bruise formed fast, legs run faster to his bedroom,
A tiny little box, with very little leg room,

^^aight , I don't like this...first bar reads iffy imo...I felt the last line but hate you usin' 'little' twice.

Abuse formed in the kitchen, the stench of alcohol was drifting,
And blinding pain gripped him, from the place where they had kicked him,

^^not bad...

Wondering what Heavens like? but at least he could rest there,
And then the booming of the stairs, had him fearing for his life now,
So he cocked back, and on the trigger, one shot, and it's lights out.

^^thought the closer was nice...

some parts aren't good , and then others I thought were pretty tight...a mixed bag?...yeah.Your word usage is sometimes weird and that interrupted my read here...flow is ok altho a few sections it's not helped by forced multies.As always I thought the emotion you bring was there and imagery was slick in a couple of areas...def not one of your better verses man , I enjoyed it just seems mad rushed yeah.

Schem:

The panic ensues as soon as Matic's in view,
Watch me scatter the room faster than asteroids move.

^^ahh that's hot...

I beat suckers with trees, makem suck out the sap.

^^lol...

The way that I run this... my nicknames The Incumbent.
Im so wild with these rhymes that, when im schoolin you kids...
Youll thank god for that no child left behind act.
Gone in sixty seconds, Im the bomb when I spit.
Im like Lebron and James Bond if they bonded and shit!

^^ha , content is nice but it's probably the scheme used as to why I like this so much...

I could of quoted other lines but chea , you know how it be...the first bar was ill and just set up your whole spit.Flow is fire to me as is the content for the majority...likin' the wordplay and metaphors , once again diction shines thru when you write.You both know my style and what I like to read...so I'm sorry Jay but this is a no brainer , Ima take well written brag shit over an average emotional piece any day.

vote - Schematic.

...stay upwards y'all.

[PRECISE ']

well

shit .... on the real

schematic ya shit was dope , fresh ass lines , neva heard or read um before

real confident bars ,, it was so close to a battle though ? not open mic

open mics can be anything , thats true ... but more topical



I drove you bitches off the road to riches,
Plus my flows are known to give kids motion sickness.
And I spit cane so you know I be numbin.
The way that I run this... my nicknames The Incumbent.


dopeset piece ....


jay rede



now u came wit a def open mic , topical story based script

I was diggen it , could came wit a lil betta wordplay in this

just for the fact that the topic was pretty dope , the way u

ended it was dope

was more of an open mic , not just punches aimed at nobody

Chased home from school, Reluctant to let the liquid salt show,
Got a knife pulled out today, then they smacked him with a rock blow,
A bruise formed fast, legs run faster to his bedroom,
A tiny little box, with very little leg room,



the way you opend it , was ill , I was def wanting to keep reading




vote ... Jay rede


DONT GET IT TWISTED .. i liked how shem flipd it .. shit was DOPE I just couldnt get with how he laced his verse for a "open mic" drop , Im neva big on those battle bars aimed at nobody ,, i mean what is the point ?

[Ruck]

alright..first off.. 8 bars? SHIT IS WEAK!
i know schem wasnt happy.

here we go:

JR.
wtf man? the kinda peice you wrote you could have EASILY wrote more, i would think 12 bars wasnt enough.
but yeh, this was a cool peice, nice storyline. last line is pretty slick. the flow was onpoint, it was basically like reading a story with a verse style line layout haha. but yeh nice peice good shit. favourite part:

Screaming boomed his ears, covering them with his blanket,
Blocking out his thoughts, he taught his memory to blank it,

nice rhyme i was feelin it.

Sk3M4T!C.
hahah i felt a bit of anger in this verse, first line i was impressed. shit was ill, i could feel a joe budden in the greenroom type sense to this verse, you were pissed off, spat some sick shit and was out. there was a lot of quoteables some dope one liners, hahahaha just a funny verse, something i would write. kind of a braggy diss. sliiiiick.

I drove you bitches off the road to riches,
Plus my flows are known to give kids motion sickness.

fuckin sick.

Vote - Schematic
this was a lot closer then i thought it would be, i thought schem would win, then i read JRs and i was impressed i was thinkin shit whats schem comin back with, and with an enjoyable verse as it was i couldnt go against it. i think this battle could go either way, JR would have won if i didnt find schems verse as entertaining as it was, like a verse i would write so i felt it.

great battle - RTF on mine.

[Don Dotta]

This battle was pretty fuckin dope yo..Rede has elevated so much its fuckin crazy..

Screaming boomed his ears, covering them with his blanket,
Blocking out his thoughts, he taught his memory to blank it,
He never had a doubt that this torture would be his fate's depth,
And should he run away? contemplating how to fake death,
A fear passed him quick, but he felt guilty for his next flare,
Wondering what Heavens like? but at least he could rest there,

Can neone say dope?!?!?..this shit was fuckin sick rede..much props..for real!!

My styles the malediction, I got that fuckin battle-sickness.
They see the bullet holes like, "What kind of Matic is this??"
I drove you bitches off the road to riches,
Plus my flows are known to give kids motion sickness.

Motion sickness line was dope..definetly a good flip..



Battle to me was dumb close yo..im actually having a bit of trouble choosing a winner..both brought some pretty dope shit.. good amount of quotables in each verse considering they were both so damn short i have to give you both props..schem came dope as usual with the real nice flow and as i quoted above i think the motion sickness line was pretty nice..the lebron lines was tight as well..i really think that rede should get his props on this as well yo, the dude elevated alot since the last time he been in the league and he needs to get the credit where its deserved...imma have to say...




Vote:Rede





too close really to call it..i hope to see you both face off again..props....eZ

[FranchisE]

this was dope i had wrote a breakdown
bar 4 bar when i was just on
my mans comp..
strong can check IPs on my posts bout an hour ago...
im on ps3 now wit
pop up keypad ... cant type much..or quote..
cant paste...but my point on
this one was JR came wit a dope verse..
some imagry.. prolly wit mention of
the smell of alcohol .... whol verse was
fresh due to that on a often topic.. poem
like suicide verse.. shit kept my attention..


schem...
verse had flow...sick flow
and with the usual braggy angle
it had enough punches and and
clever rhymes it kept me into it..
some points had me like damn..
that shit was nice right there...


OVERALL
i gotta go wit schem..
based on my overall view ..
both flow
..both shine in areas...

[Pembroke]

Nice battle, kids.

Jay - Well written with a compelling element to the storyline, I liked how you told it in a cool fashion, being neutral to both sides without sacrificing the personality it gave off. The flow was smooth, something I'm not used to from you since in the past you've always had conflict along the lines of text and audio. This was seven steps up, Rede.. keep improving.

Schematic - Hah, this must be easy for you.. it was nice, yeah yeah but it was basic for you. Some kick it in the cypher with Mal and Vulgar type of shit.. nothing serious that'll stay in my head until next year like you're capable of with your brag drops. Average schematic knucklebustas..

Im so wild with these rhymes that, when im schoolin you kids...
Youll thank god for that no child left behind act.
Gone in sixty seconds, Im the bomb when I spit.
^Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhh.. you had it but you lost it, hahaha..

Scheme still took it, but Jay Rede almost closed his hands around Scheme's undetecting throat.. don't get lazy lil nigga.

v/ Schematic

Reason: An act of good Samaritanship

Stay up to both

[STRONGARM]

4 - 2 Schem..

[R.D.]

Chased home from school, Reluctant to let the liquid salt show,
Got a knife pulled out today, then they smacked him with a rock blow,
A bruise formed fast, legs run faster to his bedroom,
A tiny little box, with very little leg room,

word cool opener, doesn't give much away just a kid getting bullied i guess..flow is straight

Abuse formed in the kitchen, the stench of alcohol was drifting,
And blinding pain gripped him, from the place where they had kicked him,

oh ok.. here we go lol.. nice little bar her decent flow and everything

Not safe at school, education was his only lifeline,
Felt unsafe in the day, but feared the worst at night time,

didn't like the safe/unsafe idea but still cool

Screaming boomed his ears, covering them with his blanket,
Blocking out his thoughts, he taught his memory to blank it,
He never had a doubt that this torture would be his fate's depth,
And should he run away? contemplating how to fake death,

cool flow, cool wording.. i love the ideas.. not big on blanket/blank it

A fear passed him quick, but he felt guilty for his next flare,
Wondering what Heavens like? but at least he could rest there,
And then the booming of the stairs, had him fearing for his life now,
So he cocked back, and on the trigger, one shot, and it's lights out.

thought that was a bad ending.. no build up to the possession of the gun at all i mean you had 4 additional bars you could have used.. and i just thought that was a cop out. i wasn't to found of the story or open mic because i didn't feel it build at all man and would have liked that a lot


The panic ensues as soon as Matic's in view,
Watch me scatter the room faster than asteroids move.

word!

This Rapflava shit? Its like a full time job to me.
So ill stay stackin paper, while ya'll fold my laundry.
Keep tuckin your knees, and get the fuck out my lap.
I beat suckers with trees, makem suck out the sap.

eh.. not great for you but cool flow as usual

My styles the malediction, I got that fuckin battle-sickness.
They see the bullet holes like, "What kind of Matic is this??"

lol word..

I drove you bitches off the road to riches,
Plus my flows are known to give kids motion sickness.

true

And I spit cane so you know I be numbin.
The way that I run this... my nicknames The Incumbent.

nice word man, haven't seen that rhymed before

Im so wild with these rhymes that, when im schoolin you kids...
Youll thank god for that no child left behind act.

sick!.. i love it, flow scheme change up was nice

Gone in sixty seconds, Im the bomb when I spit.
Im like Lebron and James Bond if they bonded and shit!

hahah word! thats sick

My talent has no limit, therefor I am the infinite.
So in my lifetime your life might pass in a minute.

sick concept

I straight devour that foolish talk, yall barely even food for thought.
So all these fuckin battles got me chewin' alot!

eh decent closer could have had more.. surprised you only matched his at that was big of you

in om battles i like the om more than the topic direction but both of these drops were decent, i think sche slacked a bit but had some sick lines in there that really out-shined everything jay said
so

v-schem

[STRONGARM]

5 - 2 Schematic Wins..!